Two Frogs, One Cup … One Gross Pre-Flight Beverage

Would you drink from the water in his personal pond? PHOTO - WIKIPEDIA

Let’s say you were a college student with a pair of pet frogs. And the spring semester was over, and you had to fly back home from the West Coast to the East Coast. And well, you’re a pet person: Even if your pets are slimy amphibians, No Frog Left Behind!

How do you get your frogs onto a plane?

My sister-in-law faced this dilemma back in the Golden Age of air travel when you could actually carry liquids on board.

And while liquids were allowed, frogs in the cabin … well, not so much.

Sis-in-law knew this. So she decided her frogs would be undeclared stowaways – in a Thirstbuster cup! She filled it with water, and slipped the frogs into their portable pond. She completed the ruse with a straw poking out of the lid.

She showed up at the security checkpoint with her carry-on and her Cup o’ Frogs. The TSA agents, being TSA agents, wanted to make sure she wasn’t sneaking something harmful aboard.

They asked her to take a nice big gulp from her “Thirstbuster.”

I can only imagine her reaction. I wish I’d been there. I mean, I never shy away from a eating something most people find gross. I’ve eaten all manner of wacky foods: Rancid shark meat, possum pie, camel schnitzel, many more. My sister-in-law would not touch any of this. No way.

But I guess she would drink FrogWater (similar to Vitamin Water, but with frogs rather than Vitamin C). She sucked up just enough of her amphibian amigos’ liquid habitat to satisfy the TSA stooges, grimaced, swallowed, nearly gagged, and proceeded through security.

And to think – she could’ve just had frog legs the night before and spared herself the horror drinking FrogWater (which would be a great name for a stoner/sludge jam band)!